The date was August 9, 2017... Here I was, sitting in an office for my final interview concluding my 18 month mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints in Boise, Idaho. After closing my prayer, I looked up to make eye contact with my Mission President who paused for several moments before proceeding..

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"Sister Starkey, as you were praying I had an impression... 'blossom' or 'blooming'... I'm not sure which is more accurate."

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This, my friends, is where my new beginning begins...

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    Serving as a full time missionary impacted me in ways that can't quite accurately be described in words. So much joy, sadness, work, faith, patience, disappointment, practice, peace, fear, courage, forgiving, serving, biking, loving, studying... many tears and many laughs! These and so many other words can help in describing what a mission was for me.  But as I said, words do little in describing my personal feelings for what my mission did for me... The Lord tenderly walked with me throughout those 18 months... he guided me to those who needed me (but in reality, I needed them)... and through those people the Lord taught me so much. I saw miracles... I felt powerful feelings that I had never before experienced. I was humbled over and over again through my weaknesses... But I ultimately learned the definition of endurance and perseverance. Sitting in my Mission President's office that day, I was overcome with feelings of peace, joy, accomplishment, gratitude, and love for the Lord. He had never let me go alone at any point on my mission and because of that I had gotten to know him really well. At the end of my mission I had walked away with so many new friendships.... but above all... I walked away from that experience having found a real relationship with Jesus Christ.

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    Returning back to my hometown was exciting for me but hard at the same time.. I was excited for a new adventure but sad to leave those in Idaho I had come to love so much. For the first 3 months being home, things were incredible!! But after that, things became hard.... for several months I began struggling with various health challenges. I had been so full of faith only months before but the continual waves of trials I was experiencing were beginning to take a toll. I remember sitting down and talking with my parents about how I felt... Remembering what my Mission President said, now, just made me feel worse.

 

    "How could I go from feeling so full of light to so dim with discouragement in such a short period of time? I felt full bloom as a missionary and now it feels like I am just some withering, brittle plant." It was then that my mom spoke words of wisdom that changed my entire perspective:

 

"Ashlynn, flowers don't bloom forever... in fall they dry up, but come spring.. they are back in full bloom."

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     This is the inspiration for my blog... to share what I continue to learn throughout my journey including the highs and lows. I hope to be able to shed light and bring perspective to you in whatever situation you may be in. I hope to help you see, like my mom did for me, that you are 'Ever Blooming' even if it is not your most ideal season. When you are not in full bloom you are still are in the process of becoming.

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"Sometimes when you're in a dark place, you think you've been buried, but actually you've been planted."

 

 Ashlynn Starkey

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